The Other Day My Parents Invited My Sister And Her Husband, Both My Brothers And Our Wives To A Dinner. We All Lead Different Lives And Sometimes It's Difficult To Get Everybody Together. It Was Nice To See Each Other And Chat For A Spell.
As My Eyes Browsed The Table I Could See How We All Have Aged. Well, Maybe With The Exception Of My Brother Robin. Not Sure What His Secret Is For His Youth Like Appearance, But Looks Are Not Everything. They Say Never Judge A Book By It's Cover. Through Our Conversations We Talked About Our Eye Sight And How It's Not Like It Use To Be. Well What Is? Otherwise It Was An Occasion We Could All Get Together And Enjoy Each Others Company. We Were Together This Past Summer At Our Family Reunion. One Thing We Have Been Reminded Of Is, Life Is Short And We Just Don't Know What Lies Ahead Of Us. We Tend To Believe The Older Generation Depart This World Before The Young. It Doesn't Always Work Out That Way.
As Christmas Nears, My Mind Has Wandered Of Christmas Past. The Times When I Was Young Growing Up On Franklin. Those Christmas Days Pretty Much Molded What I passed On To My Family And Our Children.
This Christmas As Most My Readers Are Aware Will Be Minus One Family Member. This Christmas Will Be Our First Without My Son Bobby. As Each Day Nears Christmas, I Find Myself Becoming Sad And Lonely. Even Though I Could Be Surrounded By A Mass Of People, That Void In Your Heart Seems To Be Abundant.
I Believe The First Calendar Year Is The Hardest. This Is Not My First Years Of Grieving. As I Remembered In Earlier Years, That First Birthday, The Seasons, The Events Missed, Are All Important And Significant In The Grieving Process. I Believe Soon After The First Of The New Year, Life As We Know It Will Gradually Become More Bearable. Bobby Passed Away On The 29th Of December. So You See One Year Has Not Passed Yet. However, From The Time Of His Death And The Day We Buried Him It Was 10 Days. Of Those Days My Father And Sister Both Celebrated A Birthday. I Can't Even Remember Today Whether I Called Them And Wished Them A Happy Birthday. I'm Sure They Were Quite Aware Of My State Of Mind During Those Days. Those Were My Darkest Of Days. The Loss Of A Child No Matter The Age Can Be Devastating For Any Parent.
I Haven't A Clue Who All Reads My Blogs. It May Only Be A Handful. No Matter The Number, I Want To Thank You For Reading Some Of My Deepest Thoughts. Some People Don't Believe In Blogs. They Feel Personal Happenings Should Be Private And Not Be Put Out There For All To Read. I Have Always Enjoyed Writing. Blogging Has Given Me The Opportunity To Share My Thoughts. It's No Secret This Past Year Has Been A Roller Coaster Of Emotions. I Appreciate My Readers Sticking With Me By Reading My Words.
One Thing Is For Certain, You Have No Idea What You Will Read When You Come To My Blog Site. It Could Be Something Funny, Sad, Or Maybe Even Weird. No Matter The Topic, It Came From Me, Either Through Life Experience Or Just Plain Silliness.
The Full Cycle Of One Year Is Fast Approaching. I'm Sure On These Dates It Will Give Me An Opportunity To Reflect And Reminisce. I Believe Once That Cycle Is Complete, Life Get's Better. They Say Time Heals Wounds And I Do Believe That. For Some It Takes Longer Than Others.
I Just Want My Readers To Know That Even Though This Past Year Of My Blogging May Have Been Depressing, The New Year Can Be Promising. I Just Don't Want To Lose Devoted Readers By Depressing Them. This Past Year Has Been Difficult. I Cannot Describe In Words My Feelings, My Loss. What I Can Describe Is, Each Morning When I Look Into The Mirror, I See A Man Getting Older. My Hair And Beard Has Grayed. I See That Time Doesn't Stand Still For Anyone.
I Don't Have Plans To Formally Celebrate This Christmas Like The Ones I Had In Years Past. Of Course It's Because Of The Loss Of My Son. I Still Consider Myself In Mourning.
I Am Looking Forward To The New Year Of 2012. This New Year To Me Completes The Calendar Cycle. I Felt Like I Needed To Reserve This Year For Him. The New Year Of 2012 Represents Fresh Idea's And Hope For The Future.
I Would Say I Knew My Son Best. I Knew His Character. I Know He Believed In My Mission To Help The Poor. He Would Not Want Me Or His Mother To Mourn His Loss For The Rest Of Our Lives. He Would Want Us To Be Happy And Productive. I Know This To Be True Because I Knew Him Well. All The Reminders I Have Of Him Prove To Me He Enjoyed Life. Even His Last Days Had Laughter In It. There Are Times We Don't Understand Why We Do The Things We Do. All We Can Do Is Put Our Trust In God's Hands And Pray That One Day We Will See Each Other Again.
Next Time You Look At Yourself In The Mirror, Take An Extra Long One.
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